Free, No Email Required
Ten questions, about three minutes, and an honest read on how much of your relationship you can actually see. Three versions, depending on where you're standing.
Are you picking the right person?
Pick where you are and answer ten questions. The check names what it sees under your waterline, the patterns, the gut feeling you overrode, the big thing nobody's brought up yet, and tells you what to do about each one.
Three paths: I'm single · I'm dating someone · I'm engaged
Three of the nine results you might land on. It doesn't flatter you.
Take the Iceberg CheckFlipping the Iceberg: After the I Do
For the people already in it. The iceberg didn't disappear when you said yes, it just started showing up differently, in the daily arguments and the old habits and the fights that go quiet instead of finishing.
This is the check for a marriage you want to understand instead of keep score in. It pairs with the second book, After You Say I Do.
Open the Marriage MeterWho are you without the title of wife?
For the women rebuilding. Eleven questions about where you actually are now: the identity, the people who took his side, the years you call wasted, and what you'd refuse next time. It names what's still under the water and tells you what to do with each piece.
Runs right here on this site. Your answers never leave your browser.
Take the Rebuild CheckNothing is required to start, and you'll have your result before you've finished your coffee.
What It Actually Tells You
The check doesn't hand you a number and leave. It names the specific things it picked up on, and says plainly why each one matters.
Same fight, different person. That's the clearest sign something under the water is steering.
Your body noticed something before your head agreed to it. That's worth going back for.
You're seeing the 10 percent they've decided to show you. The gap you keep explaining away is the story.
Money, kids, and faith don't get easier to raise later. They get more expensive.
You are not the cause, the control, or the cure of another person's behavior.
Deposits, guests, and family expectations are not reasons to marry somebody.
If You Want to Keep Going
The check is free and complete on its own. If your result opens something up, the program inside the app walks the whole framework in order: eight chapters discovering and flipping your own icebergs, then eight on flipping the person you're dating or marrying.
The check has a chapter on recognizing abuse, and if you flag fear it will tell you to read that one before anything else. It says, in plain words, that you are not overreacting.
You don't have to go through an app to get help. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. If you're in immediate danger, call emergency services.
Where This Fits
Four ways in, and they're meant to stack rather than compete.
The framework your result came from, start to finish, in Charisse's own words.
Get the BookIn person, 7 to 8:30 PM, free seat, and the last one at this price. Hear it from her and bring your question.
Save My SeatFair Questions
It's free and you can take it without handing over an email address. You'll be offered the paid program afterward, and you're welcome to ignore that and keep your result.
No, and it's careful about that. In Charisse's words: "This is a self-reflection tool built from the Iceberg Framework. It is not a clinical or predictive test of whether you should get married, and it is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling." It shows you what you haven't been looking at. The decision stays yours.
The Iceberg Check. "I'm dating someone" is one of its three paths, with its own ten questions and its own results.
The Rebuild Check, which was built for exactly that. It's written for women; if you're a divorced man, the Iceberg Check's single path will serve you better, since finding your own iceberg is the same work either way.
Yes, and comparing notes afterward is often where the real conversation starts. Take it separately first, honestly, then trade. One caution: understanding your own patterns doesn't mean taking responsibility for someone else's behavior.
Your answers aren't sent to Charisse. The check is a reflection tool, not an intake form.
